Mel Greig: The one detox trick that actually works

Want to know the easiest way to get you craving something? Deprive yourself of it.

Case in point: alcohol. Our best friend and worst enemy.

Stuff Dry July, the latest trend is Dry Jan. It doesn’t really have the same ring to it though, so let’s go with Jansober… or even Janban… but we all know now is the time when people make those promises to be good.

Anyone else got silly season regret? Photo: Instagram/melgreigradio
Anyone else got silly season regret? Photo: Instagram/melgreigradio

I think these are the three top reasons we embark on this new year journey:

  1. Weight-loss

  2. You woke up too many times going “Why did I send that text?” or “Who was that random guy I pashed last night?”

  3. Your liver is literally punching you from the inside trying to escape your unhealthy body telling you to calm the hell down and have a break.

This time last year I was stepping into the New Year and I ticked all three of those boxes, so I embarked on a 10-week alcohol detox and was surprised by the results.

To be completely honest, I was expecting to feel like some healthy fitness machine, to have green smoothies pumping through my veins instead of blood. I was exercising and eating really well at the same time so I managed to lose eight kilos just before my 35th birthday in March.

When I had my first drink, it had a different taste. I wasn’t keen on it at all and it made me feel nauseous… but I persisted through a few champagnes and finally found that familiar taste.

Who can say no to champagne? Photo: Instagram/melgreigradio
Who can say no to champagne? Photo: Instagram/melgreigradio

I basically made up for the 10 weeks of no drinking in the following few weeks over my birthday celebration, all the weight came back on and I found myself gagging for cheeky binge wines for the remainder of the year.

I hear of some people giving up alcohol for three or six months but with the intention to drink again. I wonder if they experienced the same thing and found themselves gagging for a wine after easing back into it?

That’s why this year I’m truly working on the art of moderation and my detox will become a lifestyle - a lifestyle that will carry through for the next 12 months. I’m not an expert by any means, but I do understand how my body and mind works, and if I deprive it of something that I don’t end up giving up completely it will crave it even more. Similar to sex. Imagine going on a dick detox for 12 months and then you turn into a crazy sex lady once you re-introduce it into your life. All good things in moderation.

Forget depriving yourself, it's all about moderation. Photo: Instagram/melgreigradio
Forget depriving yourself, it's all about moderation. Photo: Instagram/melgreigradio

I’m trying 14 days on and 14 days off ALL YEAR. I just feel I need to be realistic and I know that I will always love a dinner and drinks with the girls and I can still have that with my new plan.

For 14 days I will abstain from alcohol and have a clean diet, with exercise built into that too. At the end of those 14 days I will allow myself a few occasions to have my special treats and social adventures. During that time though my diet will remain 90 percent healthy and the exercise will be exactly the same. I then go back into a 14-day alcohol detox and repeat. Will it work? I’ll keep you up to date, whatever plan you’ve decided to go for good luck and just remember it’s all about that mental strength. YOU CAN DO IT.

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