The four tell-tale signs you’re headed for a breakup

He’s the man who can reportedly predict whether a couple will divorce with up to 94 per cent accuracy, so when psychology professor Dr John Gottman outlines the warning signs you need to be aware of in your relationship, you listen.

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According to Dr Gottman, here are the four warning signs you need to watch out for, which he's terrifyingly dubbed the “four horseman of the apocalypse”. Yikes.

1. Criticism

No relationship is all smooth sailing and everyone’s entitled to have a whinge about how their boyf never cleans the bathroom. But according to Dr Gottman, red flags should go up when there’s criticism that focuses on “a defect in one’s partner’s personality”, so something directed towards a person’s core traits, for example, saying “You always talk about yourself. You are so selfish.”

2. Contempt

A partnership implies two people are on equal footing, but if the two of you have elements of contempt in your communications – through “name-calling, eye-rolling, sneering, mockery, and hostile humour” – it’s time to reassess how you treat each other.

“It’s virtually impossible to resolve a problem when your partner is getting the message that you’re disgusted with him or her,” explains Dr Gottman.

3. Defensiveness

Is your first instinct to lash out in a fight, rather than take a step back and try to talk things through rationally?

This pattern of behaviour can see people making excuses for their own actions and pushing the blame on others, which could signal serious problems in a relationship.

4. Stonewalling

We’ve all ignored our annoying partners from time to time, but stonewalling takes things a step further. Described as an “emotional withdrawal from interaction”, if you find yourself disconnecting yourself from a conversation – even if you’re physically present – the warning signs are clear, says Dr Gottman.

Not only is this frustrating for your partner, it also prevents whatever you’re arguing over from being resolved, and can lead to bigger problems.

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