There’s a reason even happy people cheat

It’s no secret that relationship problems are the biggest reason people tend to have affairs.

However, it might surprise you to find out that even people in a happy relationship can sometimes find themselves looking elsewhere.

Relationship psychologist Esther Perel has revealed even though someone could be well-balanced, caring and completely invested in their relationship, they might still cheat.

Even people in happy relationships cheat. Photo: Getty
Even people in happy relationships cheat. Photo: Getty

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“Straying isn’t necessarily a symptom of a relationship gone awry,” Esther tells Mia Freedman’s No Filter podcast.

In her latest book, The State of Affairs, Esther says that in these examples the actual cheating isn’t about compensating for something that’s missing in their relationship.

Sometimes cheating is about self discovery, says psychologist. Photo: Getty
Sometimes cheating is about self discovery, says psychologist. Photo: Getty

Instead it’s more about self-discovery, and looking for an opportunity for growth or transformation.

Esther says in this case it’s less about a problem, and more about someone ‘looking for a better version of themselves’.

“Affairs are about hurt and betrayal and deception but they’re also about longing and loss and self-seeking,” Esther said.

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