When you’re in a wedding party, there are many rules surrounding proper etiquette — but the biggest one is to never upstage the bride.
As a bridesmaid your duty is to make the big day go off without a hitch, seamlessly supporting the newlyweds in making their “I dos” as perfect as possible.
One bride feels like her best friend did…well, the exact opposite.
In a post on an online forum aptly titled “She’s stolen my wedding…” user daftpink says her bridesmaid booked the same venue as her for her own wedding day, five weeks before daftpink’s big day.
“I am getting married in June – we’re having a ‘wedding weekend’ and have hired a lovely large house and guest cottages with an indoor swimming pool, games room etc. from the Friday to Monday for our 25 guests. We have organized a meal on the Friday night, a BBQ party for the Saturday after the registry office and then a chilled out pool party on the Sunday,” she wrote.
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“My best friend also has her wedding planned for September – a more formal church affair… Only now, best friend has announced that the wedding plans have changed as she is eight weeks pregnant….and that she has just booked the same house and is planning to invite close family and friends to join them for a relaxing weekend away to celebrate their wedding – five weeks before my wedding!”
The bride’s main concern is that she shares the same close friends and family as her best friend, meaning the guests would essentially be attending the same wedding celebration.
Commenters were quick to share their opinions, with most agreeing the best friend was way in the wrong. Some even went as far as to suggest the bride should remove her friend from the guest list.
“I am normally pretty laid back, and think that people get way too excited and precious about weddings. But that is absolutely disgraceful behaviour. I would un-invite her from my wedding, and not attend hers,” commented one person.
“I’d be re-evaluating my friendship and whether I even wanted her and her partner to be part of my 25 wedding guests. People will know she’s peed you off and work out pretty quickly why,” added another.
Among the recommendations to use her friend’s wedding as a trial run to improve her own plans, others questioned why the bride was so upset about sharing a venue, citing that the most important part of a wedding is the marriage.
“Does it really matter? It’s hardly likely to be exactly the same anyway and surely the important thing is your marriage?” asked one user.
“I get why people are suggesting you make your wedding bigger and better than hers. But isn’t that forgetting what the occasion is all about? To celebrate your marriage. If you start upping your budget to add in extra bells and whistles, you risk focusing on one-upmanship rather than enjoying your celebration with your closest loved ones. Don’t lose sight of what the event is about. It isn’t an opportunity or revenge on your former best friend. It’s a personal event for you and your fiancé,” added another.
While the bride has yet to make a decision, the majority of recommendations suggest confronting the friend and asking her to change her own wedding details.
What do you think? Would you be upset if someone did this on your wedding day?
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