It’s hard to keep up with what’s happening in dating these days.
We’ve had ghosting, cushioning and breadcrumbing, benching and draking – almost everyday a new term is coined.
The latest ‘trend’, called ‘love bombing’, is doing the rounds – but we’re not sure it’s really something that should gain any kind of momentum.
Psychiatrist and author Dale Archer says love bombing is “an attempt to influence another person with over-the-top displays of attention and affection”.
Sure, a bit of romance never hurt anyone, but in this instance it’s more than just roses and grand gestures.
“It includes lots of romantic conversation, long talks about ‘our future,’ and long periods of staring into each other’s eyes,” Dale writes for Psychology Today.
“The common thread is a cycle that starts with intense courtship and idealisation over a very short period of time — days or weeks, not months. Idealisation is when partners see each other as ‘perfect,’ ‘meant to be,’ or ‘soul mates’.”
While this might still seem relatively tame, the issue arises when things turn sour and the person who was once the loving partner becomes riddled with jealousy.
And that’s when things can get out of hand.
“The important thing to remember about love bombing is that it is psychological partner abuse, period,” he explains.
“When one person intentionally manipulates and exploits another’s weakness or insecurity, there’s no other word for it. Love is not about controlling who you see or what you do.”
So love bombing is basically emotional abuse and it’s definitely not a ‘trend’ we want to see take off.