A mum has been blasted online after revealing her told her 12-year-old daughter to lay off the junk food or she would find herself overweight.
The woman, who goes by the name ‘hopefullhelpful’ on parenting forum Mumsnet, came up against an onslaught of backlash after she told her story, claiming she only told her daughter to watch her waistline because it had grown 2cm since September.
Clearly aware of the fact that she was about to get about to get some angry mums telling her off on the post, she started off by saying she only knows her daughter’s weight because she has a minor medical condition which means she is weighed regularly.
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“She’s still JUST in the healthy BMI range but has basically moved from the lower end of the range to the top,” the mum said.
“I assumed this was puberty as we eat healthily at home and I can see online what food she’s buying for school lunches.
“However, I cleaned her room recently and found loads of sweet wrappers- a whole bedroom bins-worth.”
The mum went on to say that she sat her daughter down and had a chat with her about healthy eating and that the reason she keeps running out of allowance money was down to her sweet tooth.
“She asked me outright, ‘am I fat?’ and I said that she wasn’t BUT if she continued eating that amount of junk and putting on weight at the rate she was then she would be overweight soon,” the mum wrote.
The mum said she had thought about her daughter’s character before talking to her and thought she was ‘hugely robust and confident’ and could take it.
Her daughter had also confided in her, saying her skinny jeans and skirt for gym class were getting a bit tight and she started to go for runs and ditch the sweets.
However, it was only when they went to visit the girl’s grandmother than the mum realised she may have made an awful mistake bringing her daughter’s weight up.
“According to my mum I’ve messed up badly, you should never mention weight to an impressionable child and I’ve set her up for a lifetime of disordered eating,” the mum wrote.
“Mum said I should have found a way to manage it without talking to her about it or saying that she was on track to be overweight, but short of not giving her any allowance (and not explaining why) I’m at a loss as to how else I could have managed.”
She said her daughter is now a lot more aware of her weight than she was before and is refusing sweets and running.
She’s even reading the nutritional information on food and putting it back if she doesn’t think it’s healthy enough.
“I think I’m feeling sad that she’s doing this at 12 and am genuinely wondering if I’ve stuffed up and if so how I could have managed it better,” she said.
People were quick to offer their opinions, with many people slamming the mum for bringing it up with her daughter.
“I’m really sorry to say it but yes I think you’ve made a BIG. Mistake. I normally hate some of the mum flaming threads and I know you said it with a good heart but you’re her mum. There were ways around it,” one person said.
Another person said: “I honestly don’t know how else you could have handled it. But I would now be watching her carefully as she could be developing an eating disorder. If she starts to drop weight and she has a growth spurt at the same time, you’re going to have a skinny girl on your hands.”
However, a lot of people commended the mum for how she handled the situation, saying she nipped the daughter’s habit in the bud before it got out of hand.
“I was a fat child. I wish someone had said this to me instead of just letting me get fat,” one person said.
“I think you have done the right thing – you have put the control with her, so she makes a choice if she can have something or not,” another commenter said.”
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