It’s no secret that relationship problems are the biggest reason people tend to have affairs.
However, it might surprise you to find out that even people in a happy relationship can sometimes find themselves looking elsewhere.
Relationship psychologist Esther Perel has revealed even though someone could be well-balanced, caring and completely invested in their relationship, they might still cheat.
“Straying isn’t necessarily a symptom of a relationship gone awry,” Esther tells Mia Freedman’s No Filter podcast.
In her latest book, The State of Affairs, Esther says that in these examples the actual cheating isn’t about compensating for something that’s missing in their relationship.
Instead it’s more about self-discovery, and looking for an opportunity for growth or transformation.
Esther says in this case it’s less about a problem, and more about someone ‘looking for a better version of themselves’.
“Affairs are about hurt and betrayal and deception but they’re also about longing and loss and self-seeking,” Esther said.