Mum slammed after admitting stepson makes her ‘flesh crawl’

There’s nothing trickier than figuring out relationships, especially when you’re trying to work out the dynamics of a new blended family.

One mum has revealed just how hard she’s finding it in a brutally candid post she shared to online forum Netmums, detailing her awkward and uncomfortable relationship with her 11-year-old stepson.

“I’m having real problems coping with my feelings towards my step son,” the user named Tess wrote. “I’ve been with my partner for about 18 months. We married quickly – 10 months into the relationship. Quick I know, but I’ve known this man and his son for years.”

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While Tess and her stepson used to get along fine, the two are now butting heads whenever he comes to stay.

“I hate weekends, I hate him coming here to stay,” she wrote. “He’s always questioning everything, butting into conversations and generally being annoying.

“I’ve spoken to my other half about this and he just says to tell him off, but I really want to smack him, which I would never do, but it bothers me that the urge is there. He’s not particularly untidy, he can be disrespectful at times, but I suppose that’s normal for any 11 year old.

Tess is well aware that her stepson knows how she feels, but she just can’t rein in her emotions.

“I know that he’s not stupid and has probably picked up on the fact that I don’t like him, which leaves me feeling so ashamed of myself for feeling like this,” she wrote.

“I can’t stand him hugging me or trying to sit next to me. He makes my flesh crawl. This is really hard to admit but I hate him.”

The woman’s dilemma drew a range of responses with some Netmums users shocked at her feelings towards her stepson.

“Wow I’m going to be brutally honest here as quite frankly I can’t quite believe what I’ve just read… he’s a child,” wrote one. “You want to smack him? He makes your flesh crawl? You think he knows you don’t like him? What a poor child to be around someone whose transmitting that sort of behaviour towards him.”

Meanwhile others threw their support behind the struggling mum and urged her to talk to someone about the issue.

“I would definitely encourage you to seek some professional support like therapy,” added another user. “It seems like something has been triggered in you and for the sake of your stepson you need to resolve this.”

Others shared their own personal experiences of being a stepparent.

“Step parenting is hard – I have 2 full time and one of them is exceptionally ‘trying’ and sometimes things pop in my head that aren’t kind or right,” advised another. “I found it got worse for me after the birth of my baby but after working through it I could pinpoint why I felt like I did and I had to really work on my own resentment to work through it.”

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